Measures in Time

Measuring the can and can not do-s is a funny thing. I can still feed myself most times. I need help dressing. Sometimes I can hold the electric toothbrush, but I can not turn it on/off. You get the idea. Now it's a blur in time. The changes so eerily slow. Like the tide coming in or going out. You can't actually see it, but the evidence is there in the end when there's only a tiny bit of beach left, or you have to go further down to reach the edge of the water. I look at pictures from just 2-3 years ago. I am still able to sit for about 4 hours in a chair. My hair is longish and curly. I can still "scrunch" it. I am wearing real clothes.

The decline stands out in comparison today. My hair is cut very short now. It's so much easier for those who take care of me. I mostly wear nightgowns. It just means a one time dress out; no need to do it all again in the nighttime. I need someone to give me my pills. I can't sit for more than an hour or two in my electric chair. The trunk stability goes. The ability to hold my head up goes. But, look at me typing away for a bit! The ostomy bag will need attention before I slumber down.

I still look at shopping websites and imagine myself wearing those cute outfits. I still peruse the makeup and the jewelry and the shoes.

I am still walking in my dreams. Here in my Shalom Babayit.